《全民追女王（2020）》完整中英文对照剧本

　我他妈真不知道 I don"t know what the fuck is going on 这个国家在干嘛 in this country, man! 每天我打开电视 Every day I turn on the TV, 就看见他妈的这些怪胎又在为权益游♥行♥ and I see these fucking freaks marching for their rights! 我们的权益呢 What about our rights? 现在该向整个世界宣布 This is our time to show the world 我们不只是网上运动 that we are not just an online movement! 我们要做出实际行动 We"re growing physically! 是时候向他们宣布 This is our time to assert ourselves 我们才是真正代表美国的民声 as the true voice of America! 我们开始吧 Yes, let"s do that! 你们可能注意到了 Now, you may have noticed 我们的朋友雅利安·格兰德 that our friend Aryan Grande 招了一个新人 has brought in a new recruit. 去他妈的犹太人 82

　欢迎你 FucktheJews82. Welcome, brother! 你好

　我好

　大家好 Hi. Heil. Heil, everybody. 白人至上

　毫无疑问 White power. Obviously. 我粉你们有一段时间了 Been a big fan of you guys for a while. 自从二战的时候就开始了

　真的 Since World War II, really. 那时你们就大显身手了 That"s when you made your big entrance, on the scene. 还有

　就是

　最后要说的就是 And, uh... Yeah. Just, um, in closing... 去他妈的犹太人 Fuck the Jews!

　欢迎 Welcome! 开始他妈的狂欢吧 Let"s fucking party! 你们在社交媒体上相当活跃吧 So you guys are, like, pretty active on social media, right? 对 Yeah. 你们平均每天发几次推特 How many times a day would you say you tweet on average? -去他犹

　-在 - Hey, FTJ! - yo! 你说你也想要纳粹纹身 You said you wanted a swastika tattoo. 你的机会来了 Now"s your chance. 我一直在想这事

　要不还是算了 Yeah, you know, I"ve been thinking about it. I"m cool. 来吧

　我们都纹了 Come on, man. We all got "em! 你们也想让我纹一个纳粹纹身吗 You guys want me to get a swastika tattoo? 对 Yeah! 那我就纹一个 I will get a swastika tattoo. 好 Yeah. 你替我一会

　我去尿个尿 Hey, take over, man. I got to take a piss. 超级酷

　谢谢帮我纹身 Super cool, guys. Thank you for this. 真叫人激动 This is really exciting. 好

　开始了 All right, here we go! 来劲了 Ooh, right! Yeah! 疼吗 That hurt? 可疼了 On many levels. Yes. 靠 Fuck!

　这是你吗 Hey! This you? 你是个记者吗 You"re a journalist? 对 Yeah! 现在这个时代

　我们都得是他妈的记者 We all got to be fucking journalists in this day and age, 因为主流媒体不报道我们的事 mainstream media not covering our side of the story! 他叫弗雷德·弗拉斯基 His name is Fred Flarsky. 他是《布鲁克林倡导报》的记者 He writes for the Brooklyn Advocate. -他妈的是个犹太人

　-什么 - He"s a fucking Jew! - What? 其实

　其实吧

　好说

　都好说 Look, look, look. Okay, okay, okay. Hey! 你来这干嘛 What are you doing here? 你♥他♥妈♥是特意过来打我们脸吗 You"re here to fucking embarrass us, huh? -谁派你来的

　-没人派我来 - Who sent you? - No one sent me! 都好说

　我

　我 It"s okay. I"m... I"m... 他一直在录音 He"s been recording us the whole time! 他妈的

　我让你有胆卧底 Fucking shit, man! You infiltrated our group! 没命出去 You"re gonna fucking die! 这个怎么关啊 How do you turn this thing off? 摁他妈的那个红钮

　就那 The fucking red button, right there, man! 我靠 Holy shit! 太棒啦 Yeah! 我不但逃出来了 Not only did I escape... 我手♥机♥还没事 I held onto my phone!

　太棒啦 Yes! Ow! 我那么信任你 I trusted you, man! 对

　犹太人这回赢了

　混♥蛋♥ Yeah, well... Jews win this round, motherfucker! 拜拜 Peace! 福克斯晚间新闻 Tonight on Wembley News, 带你深入了解夏洛特 Field we take an in-depth look at Charlotte Field, 她是罗德学者

　普利策奖得主 a Rhodes Scholar, a Pulitzer winner, 同时还是钱伯斯总统的得意门生 and protege of President Chambers, 两年前他提携菲尔德 who tapped Field two years ago 成为美国历史上 to be the youngest secretary of state 最年轻的国务卿 in the history of this nation. 其实也是最性感的国务卿 And honestly, looking hotter than usual. 深入观察夏洛特·菲尔德 有人可能说我是性别歧视 Now, people are gonna say that"s sexist, 但是她就是性感 but, she"s just hot! 我们这样讨论女人 You know, when we talk about women in this way, 是因为我们尊重她们 it is because we respect them so much, 男人的尊重就是从欣赏身材开始的 and we start with their body. 你们两个真坏 You two are terrible. 晚安

　史蒂芬 Good night, Steven. 晚安

　国务卿女士 Good night, Madam Secretary. 全民追女王 抱歉这么晚打电♥话♥

　外♥交♥部♥长先生 Sorry for the late call, Mr. Foreign Minister.

　今天太忙了 Long day. 三个双边会谈 Three bilaterals. 我们做不到 Listen, we"re not going to be able to do it. 我们缺少足够的支持 There"s just not enough traction around this thing. 我相信

　只是

　我没有国会的支持 I believe in it, it"s just... I don"t have Congress support. 我没有美国民众的支持 I don"t have the American people"s support. 我们都不喜欢这样

　恰克 I know you and I don"t like it, Chuck, 但你知道谁喜欢吗 but you know who likes it? 88%的 45 岁以上且上过大学的美国人 88% of college-educated Americans over 45. 潜在的选民 Likely voters. 盖洛普民♥意♥测验

　我们必须得搞定 That"s Gallup. We have to make this happen. 我不是说总统缺少经验 Well, I wouldn"t call the president inexperienced. 他的确在热门电视剧里 I mean, he did play a president 扮演总统已经有十来年了 on a very popular television show for over a decade. 能拿到六个金球奖提名 You don"t get six Golden Globe nominations 足以说明他的实力 without being pretty convincing. 我觉得自己挺有趣的 Um, I do think I"m funny. 抱歉

　我以为这个是关于 I"m sorry, I thought this interview was about 促进东欧的民♥主♥的采访 promoting democracy in Eastern Europe. 好了

　下一个是 BBC 的采访 All right, next one"s BBC. 你会去问一个男内阁 Would you be asking a male cabinet member 他用什么护发产品吗 what products they use in their hair?

　我只是开玩笑 I"m just kidding. 不

　是橄榄油和蛋黄酱 No, it"s olive oil and mayonnaise. 对

　又便宜

　又闪亮 I know. So cheap. So much shine. 早上好

　总统先生 Good morning, Mr. President. 早上好

　总统先生 Good morning, Mr. President. 早上好

　总统先生 Good morning, Mr. President. 早上好

　总统先生 Good morning, Mr. President. 嘿

　夏洛特 Oh, hey, Charlotte. 被你逮到我在看自己演的电视剧了 You caught me watching my show. 总统先生

　我们还是建议使用 C 方案 Mr. President. We still recommend Option C. 我绝不会用核武器制♥造♥海啸 I am not nuking a tsunami! 亮点来了 Oh, here it is. 现在不会 Not now... 以后也不会 Not today. 我的国家更不会 Not in my house. 棒

　超爱这段 Yes! I love that! 我也是 Oh, me too. 不过我不是因为这个叫你来的 Anyway, that"s not why I called you here. 夏洛特 Charlotte. 在

　先生 Yes, sir? 我不会再连任了 I will not be seeking reelection. 真的吗 Really?

　我知道这很疯狂 Look, I know it"s crazy, 因为我首届任期才刚过半 because I"m only halfway through my first term. 而且你人气相当高

　先生 And you"re incredibly popular, sir. 我想利用这份人气 And I want to use that popularity 转型成其他 to transition into something 比总统更有声望的角色上 more prestigious than the presidency. 我想在电影界有所作为 I wanna make it in the movies. 你是要 You"re going to leave 放弃总统的职位

　去演电影吗 the Presidency to go be in movies? 对

　这会非常难 I know. It"s gonna be tough. 大概只有十个演员可以成功地 Only like, 10 guys have made that jump 从电视转入电影行业 from TV to film. 伍迪·哈里森

　乔治·克鲁尼 Woody Harrelson, George Clooney... 可能

　就这两个人 Might be... Might be just two. 我

　总统先生 I... Mr. President, have you 你考虑过要推举谁当下一任总统了吗 given any consideration as to whom you might endorse? 你可能在考虑麦克尼科尔或者克劳力 I"m sure you"re probably thinking of McNichol or Crowly. 都是很好的人选 Strong choices. 真怪

　我正在考虑 2024 年的大选 So strange, because I was considering a run in 2024. 我也通过审查了 And I"ve been vetted. 一切准备就绪 So that"s all done. 我就不住地在想 And I can"t stop thinking about what...

　如果你推举首位女总统 What it would do for your legacy 作为你最后的政♥治♥遗产会怎么样 to endorse the first female president. 这可是

　真正的政♥治♥遗产 I mean... That"s a legacy. 夏洛特 Charlotte? 我想推举你 I would like to endorse you 成为美♥利♥坚♥合众国的下一任总统 to be the next president of the United States. 如果你觉着这个主意不错 I mean, if you think that"s a good idea, 先生

　我相信你 sir, I trust you. 我

　我很荣幸 I"d... I"d be honored. 我会为夏洛特队加油打气 I"m gonna be pulling for Team Charlotte. Right? 因为你是个好秘书 Because you"ve been a great secretary. 国务秘书 ...of state. 不管怎样

　这个工作很酷 Whatever. It"s a cool job. 而且

　你干的也不错 And, um, you"ve done it well. 谢谢你

　先生 Thank you, sir. 专心工作

　别搞砸了 So stay focused. Don"t make any major screw-ups. 别和任何妓♥女♥扯上关系 Don"t kill any hookers. 对你来说应该不成问题 Probably not a problem for you. 我不知道你喜欢男还是女 无所谓 I don"t know what you"re into. Whatever. 总统之路

　指日可待 And before you know it... 改编自美国总统歌♥《向统帅致敬》 我喜欢这首歌♥ I like the sound of that. ? 她向我们走来 ?

　? Hey, here she comes ? ? 第一任女总统 ? ? It"s the first lady president ? ? 没有人能相信 ? ? Who can believe that ? ? 她真是个女人 ? ? she"s actually a woman ? 谢谢你

　先生 Thank you, sir. ? 她既智慧过人 ? ? She"s got a big brain and ? ? 而且品貌双全 ? ? a couple other assets ? 现在向我们走来的是 Oh, and here we see 国务卿夏洛特·菲尔德 Secretary of State Charlotte Field. 早上好 Good morning. 太棒了 Yes! 夏洛特·菲尔德 基准研究 大标题是

　你状态超棒 So the headline is, "You"re in great shape." -92 个百分位数

　不错

　-相当好 - Ninety-two, that"s good. - Really good. 你们可要知道 And now, keep in mind 这是一个女性竞选人的分数 that these are numbers for a female candidate. 如果你是男人

　分数可就高出天际了 If you were a man, you"d be in the 192nd percentile. 有道理 Well, that seems about right. 因为男人吧 Yeah. Cause the man... Okay. 你的幽默分是 82 Um, your sense of humor is 82, 个人特质 魅力 优雅 热情 背景

　青年 中年 幽默 相当不错

　很好 which is solid. It"s solid. 但是当然是各项分数 But, you know, we wouldn"t mind seeing those numbers 上升得越多越好啊 go up a few points, or more. 我会从一些段子手那里 So, I"m going to get some writing samples 要几份范本 from some funny speech writers. 好的

　我真的很想知道 Great. I am really interested in knowing 人们对我现有成就的看法 how people feel about my accomplishments. 对 Yeah. 好的

　我们不深入研究具体政策 Right. You know, so we don"t drill down on specific policies. 因为人们并不在乎 And that"s only because people don"t seem to care. 有点意思 That"s interesting. 话虽如此

　若能达成某些协议 With that said, if you could broker some deal 让你可以谈论 that gets you out there talking about a thing 自己真正感兴趣的事情 that you feel really strongly about, 那就太棒了 that would be great. 那太好了 Well, that"s perfect. 我们一直在寻找一个可以 I mean, we"ve been looking for 讨论环境问题的机会 an opening to start a conversation about the environment. 好吧 All right. 感情方面 Romantically, if I may... 罗曼史

　还记得在全球商业论♥坛♥上 Remember the stir online 你和加拿大总理坐在一起 when the Canadian Prime Minister and you 在网上引起的轰动吗 were seated next to each other at The Global Business Forum? 这样的关系会把你推向 90 多的高分的 A relationship like that would push you into the high 90s. 美好关系 90 多 High 90s? 接下来我们看看 That brings us to... 挥手礼仪 我挥手又错哪了 What"s wrong with my wave? 人们觉得这样的肘部动作 I think people feel that that level of elbow movement is, 让人倍感压力 It stresses people out. 这只是一个需要改进的地方 You know what, It"s just an area for improvement. 好的

　行吧

　我会改的 Okay, fine, I"ll work on the wave. 布鲁克林 早 Hey. 早

　弗雷德 Hey, Fred. 你会爱死这篇稿子的

　我差点送命了 You"re gonna love this. I almost died. 你有空吗 You got a second? 有啊 Yeah. 跟我来 Come on. 其实我有一件天大的好事要说 I actually have some really great news. 真的吗 Really? 对 Yes. 酷

　Cool. 我们刚刚被福克斯传媒收♥购♥了 We were just bought by Wembley Media. 什么 What? 对 Yeah. 你♥他♥妈♥的在开玩笑吗 Are you fucking kidding me? 我就知道你会反应过度 I knew you"d have a harsh reaction... 反应过度 A harsh reaction? 弗雷德

　这是件好事 Fred, this is a good thing. 哪好了 How? 那混♥蛋♥就是我们从第一天开始 The fucker represents everything 就一直在对抗的一切的化身 that we"ve been fighting against since day one! 我们报纸存在的意义就是 The whole point of this paper is to 与大型传媒公♥司♥作斗争 fight giant media conglomerates. 现在我们却被一家大型传媒公♥司♥收♥购♥了 Now we"ve been bought by a giant media conglomerate. 我知道这很讽刺 I do see the irony. 讽刺 Irony? 他会把这个地方变成一个宣传机器 He"s gonna turn this place into a propaganda machine. 不是好的那种

　对啊 Not the good kind, that"s right! 坏的那种

　这一切都是错的 The bad kind, that"s wrong! 我们别无选择 Well, we"re out of options. 我们一直给大♥麻♥和伴♥游♥ We"ve been running as long as we can 登广♥告♥来勉强糊口 on ads for weed doctors and escorts. 我们也来做阴♥茎♥增大的广♥告♥啊

　Let"s get penis enlargement ads, too. 没人喜欢自己的屌♥ No one likes their dick. 别这样

　弗雷德 Come on, Fred. 那个叫福克斯的 This Wembley guy, 他为了让钱伯斯当选而编故事 he ran fake stories to help get Chambers elected. 不

　他们不能证明这一点 No, they couldn"t prove that. 我们证明了 We proved it! 我写了三篇关于这事的报道 I wrote three articles about it! 都是你刊登的 You published them! 是我 I did. 这家伙嘴里吐出来的都是狗屎 The shit that comes out of this fucking guy"s mouth... 他说飓风是同性结婚造成的 He said hurricanes were caused by gay marriage. 我都不知道那这他妈的原理是什么 I don"t even get how that fucking works. 我连这中间怎么推理出来的都不知道 I don"t even get the math on that one. 弗雷德

　结束了 Fred, it"s done, all right? 结束了 It"s done? 他们正在楼上完成交易呢 They"re upstairs finalizing the deal right now. 我们得裁员三分之二 Look, we have to cut two-thirds of our staff. 三分之二 Two-thirds? 对 Yeah. 但我们想让你留下 But we wanna keep you on. 他们想让你留下 They wanna keep you on. 只是

　It"s just... 你得收敛点 You just have to tone it down a little bit. 这已经是我 I don"t know how I can tone things down any more 最收敛的状态了 than I"m toning them down. 弗雷德

　你是个优秀的作家 Okay, Fred. You"re a great writer. 谢谢 Thank you. 你很有趣

　你敢冒险

　你善交流 All right, you"re funny, you take risks, you connect with people. 我觉得马上就要转折了 I"m sensing a twist in this. 你见解独到

　真实可靠 You have a distinct, authentic voice, 但是 but... 有时候你有点太过了 Sometimes you"re a little too much. 我不觉得太过了 I don"t think I am too much! 我觉得

　正正刚刚好 I actually think I"m the perfect right portion. 你保住了你的工作 Look, you have your job. 专心工作

　只是稍微收敛一点点 Okay, focus on that and just toe the line a little bit. 老子辞职 You know what? I quit. 别这样

　弗雷德 Oh, come on, Fred. 你也该辞职

　每个人都他妈的该辞职 You should quit, too. Everyone should fucking quit. 不

　我不会辞职的

　我需要工作 No, I"m not gonna quit, I need my job. 我也需要他妈的工作

　我身无分文 I need my fucking job, too. I"m broke, man! 但我不会为他工作 But I can"t work for that guy. 起码让我炒了你

　还有遣散费可拿 At least let me fire you so you can get unemployment. 他妈的没门

　No fucking way! 我要让他知道

　老子不干了 I want him to know that I quit. 他永远不会知道的

　他都没听说过你 He"s never gonna know it he"s never heard of you. 你为了报复一个都没听说过你的人 You"re gonna destroy your life 要毁了你的人生吗 to spite a guy who"s never heard of you? 对

　你说得对

　我就要这么做 Yes! You said it best! That"s exactly what I"m doing. 你这个决定很傻

　我对你太失望了 You"re making bad decisions and it"s bumming me out, man. 彼此彼此 Well, that makes two of us. 去他妈的

　新闻业今天已死 Fuck this. Journalism died today, people. 你好

　我是弗雷德·弗拉斯基 Yes, hello, this is, uh, Fred Flarsky. 我只是 Um... I, uh, 只是想说我最近被迫辞职 was just calling to say that I was forced to quit my job recently, 成为自♥由♥撰稿人了 making me something of a free agent. 我知道以前 And I know in the past, uh, 你说我不是《泰♥晤♥士♥报♥》想要的人 you said I"m not exactly what The Times was looking for, 但我只是打来看看有没有什么转机 but I was just calling to see if anything"s changed. 龙舌兰酒 请给我回个电♥话♥

　非常感谢 Uh, just give me a ring. Thank you so much. 兰斯

　我是弗雷德 Yo, Lance. It"s Fred. Um... 我失业了

　我很丧 I lost my job and I"m very sad. 我能去找你吗 Can I come by? 我们需要安排一个会议 We need to schedule a meeting 看看他们有什么要说的 and see what they have to say.

　失陪 Excuse me. 我真不敢相信他们这样对你 Man, I can"t believe they did you like that. 糟透了

　气死我了 It"s fucked up. I"m pissed. 但是你会好起来的

　我们走吧 But you"re gonna feel a lot better, man, we"re leaving. 你现在就可以下班吗 You can leave work right now? 我他妈的当然可以下班了 Yeah, I can fucking leave. 你看到这间大办公室了吗 You see this corner office? 这表示我可以随时离开 That"s a "I can leave this bitch 这个操蛋的地方 "whenever I want" corner office. 来吧

　哥们 Come on, man. 所有人注意 Everybody! 这是我最好的哥们

　他今天刚失业 This is my best friend, and he just lost his job today. All right? 他心情烂到谷底 He"s at rock bottom. 还没那么惨 It"s not that bad. 他心情差到极点 He feels like shit. 我会让他满血复活的 And I"m gonna make him feel better. 从我们在大学起就有一个传统 It"s been a tradition since we were in college, 当其中一个人丧的时候 when one of us feels sad, 另一个必须让他嗨起来 the other one has to get him fucked up. 像小甜甜布兰妮在 2005 年左右剃光头 I"m talking Britney Spears, mid-2000s bald head, 差点把娃摔了那回那么嗨 almost dropping the baby fucked up. 不指点

　不评论 No judgement. No judgement.

　我需要取消我所有安排

　桑德尔 I need my schedule cleared, Zander. 我什么都不想干 I don"t want to do shit. 我明天之前都不在 I"m going off-grid till tomorrow. 要不这样 Matter of fact... 大家都放假一天 Everybody"s got the day off. 大家都放假

　都放假 Everybody"s got the day off. Y"all got the day off. 所有人都下班吧 Everybody, go home. 我很感激你们所有人的辛苦工作 I"m so appreciative of all of you guys" hard work. 我爱你们每一个人 I love every single one of you. 除了你

　泰德 Except you, Ted! 星期五的百吉饼是给所有人的

　泰德 Bagel Friday is for everybody, Ted! 你觉得我们不知道是你拿走的吗 You don"t think we know you taking the bagels? 对

　泰德

　烂透了 Yeah, Ted, not cool. 桑德尔 Zander. 在 Yeah? 我要两听葡萄柚汽水 I need two cans of the Pamplemousse La Croix. 里面加尊尼获加蓝牌威士忌和大♥麻♥油 I need that filled with Johnnie Walker Blue and CBD oil. 你要吧 Do you want one? 我被整惨了

　哥们 I got fucked, man. 你像色情片里的继母一样被整惨了 Yeah, you got fucked like a stepmom on Pornhub. 每个人都会摊上这种事 Well, it happens to everybody. 我以前也失业过

　烂透了 I"ve been unemployed before, it sucks.

　但我没要任何施舍 But I didn"t ask for any handouts. 我凭一己之力站起来走到现在 I picked myself up by my bootstraps and got to it. 我们现在要去哪里 Where are we going right now? 史上最棒的一天

　弗雷德

　别操心了 Best day ever, Fred. Don"t worry about it. 我已经安排了一个完美的下午 I"ve got this dope afternoon planned for us. 我们先喝完这些 First we"re going to finish these Pamplemousse"s. 再抽个烟 Play at the park. 然后去彼得·卢格餐厅 After that we"re going to go to Peter Luger"s, 给你来一份上好的牛排 get you a nice fat steak, 最后去世界野生动物基金筹资会 and then finish it off with a World Wildlife Fund benefit. 我不太想去那些有钱人的聚会 I don"t know if I want to go to some fancy rich person party. 什么

　别这样

　哥们

　别那么挑剔 What... Oh, come on, man, don"t be so judgmental, all right? 有免费酒水

　还有熊猫 It"s free booze and there"ll be pandas and shit. 人们都喜欢熊猫 People love pandas and shit. 我不太想去 I don"t know. 好吧

　算了吧

　弗雷德 All right, fine, Fred. 那就什么都别做

　回家

　什么都不做 Then just do nothing. All right? Go home, do nothing. 别想跟你最好的朋友 And don"t kick it with your best friend 还有大人小孩双拍档一起玩 and Boyz II Men. 你说什么 Say what? 对了 Oh, yeah. 大人小孩双拍档会表演 Boyz II Men is bringing

　他们经典的节奏布鲁斯

　说唱 their timeless blend of R&B, hip-hop 和新杰克摇摆 and new jack swing to the party. 我还以为你想去呢 I thought you would like to be there. 大

　那个

　大人小孩双拍档 Bo-bo-bo-Boyz II Men? ? 摩城费城

　再度归来 ? ? Motownphilly"s back again ? 说的就是这个

　哥们

　我们走吧 That"s what I"m talking about, man. Let"s do this shit. 玩尽兴

　嗨一天 Okay, let"s have fun. What a fun day. 我饿死了

　真是疯了 I am so hungry, it"s insane. 你怎么不给我个能量棒吃 Why didn"t you PowerBar me? 我给过了

　你把我的手推开了 I tried, you pushed my hand away. 肉串儿

　我没法优雅地吃串儿 Skewered foods. I can"t eat skewered foods gracefully. 我吃起来他妈的像野人一样 I look like a fucking caveman. 而且这里到处都有摄像头 Yeah, and there are cameras everywhere. 这么做真会拉低你的优雅分 That"s really gonna hurt your elegance score. 这可是我最好的分 That"s my best score. 草

　都是肉串儿 Fuck! It"s all skewered foods. 我给你撸点鸡肉下来 I"m gonna take the chicken off the skewers. 快撸

　快点

　快点 Take it off... Quickly. Quickly. 怎么这么难搞 Why do they make this so difficult... 对不起

　先生

　我的错 Oh. I"m sorry, sir. I apologize. 真是见了鬼了

　败事有余 Jesus fucking Christ. Can"t do things... 帮我弄个人墙

　人墙 Just make a fucking... Make a wall. Make a wall.

　-好

　-弄好了吗 - Yup. - Do you have it? 好了 Yes. 好

　好

　一切正常 Good. Good, good, good, good. 我的天

　这鸡肉太好吃了 Oh, my God, it"s really good chicken. 詹姆斯·斯图尔德过来了 James Steward is approaching. 詹姆斯·斯图尔德过来了 James Steward is approaching. 什么 What? 他离这不到三米 Okay, he"s about nine feet away. 他的鸡鸡离这儿只有两米多点 His dick is probably about seven feet away. 玛吉 Maggie! 只有一米八了 Six feet away. 一米五了

　快点

　吐掉

　吐 Five feet away. Spit, spit, spit, spit, spit. -詹姆斯

　-晚上好 - James! - Bonsoir. -你好

　-晚上好 - Hi. - Good evening. 真的很阔惜 I am so sorry I missed you 前几天在白宫的时候没见到你 when I was at the White House a few weeks ago. 真的很阔惜吗

　詹姆斯 Oh, are you so "sorry," James? 这个梗够你玩几年了哈 You"re never gonna stop making that joke, are you? 一直玩梗一直爽 No. I"m not. -我

　-打扰了 - Well, I... - Oh, hello. -好

　-好的 - Hi. - Oh, yes. 谢谢 Thank you.

　-再来一张

　-再来一张 - One more. One more. - One more. 谢谢

　谢啦 Merci. Thank you. 我们离开这怎么样 What do you say we get out of here? 找个私密点的地方喝一杯 Grab a drink somewhere a bit more private. -好啊

　-真的 - Yes... - Yeah? 我的天 Oh, my God! 大家嗨起来

　躁起来 Make some noise out there! Make some noise! 耶

　切克闹

　要 Yeah! Check it out, y"all! 问个问题

　我们是谁 One question, what"s the name of the group? 大人小孩双拍档 Boyz II men! 我们是谁

　要 What"s the name of the group, y"all? 大人小孩双拍档 Boyz II men! 大人小孩双拍档《摩城费城》 ? 摩城费城

　再度归来 ?

　 ? Motownphilly"s back again ? ? 来一点点东海岸摇摆 ?

　 ? Doin" a little east coast swing ? ? 大人小孩双拍档就在这唱 ?

　 ? Boyz II Men going off ? ? 不急不缓

　不紧不慢 ?

　 ? Not too hard not too soft ? ? 姗姗来迟的这份 ?

　 ? It"s long overdue but now ? ? 躁动与喧嚣 ?

　 ? Philly is slammin" ? ? 大人小孩双拍档甲乙丙乙乙丁 ?

　 ? Boyz II Men ABC BBD ? 我说这酷毙了吧 I told you this would be dope. 对

　我顿时倍儿精神 Yeah, uh... This is really cheering me up. ? 开着黑色大奔

　朋友遍天下 ?

　? Jet black Benz plenty of friends ? ? 还可享遍费城的牛排 ?

　 ? And all the Philly steaks you could eat ? ? 在校的每一天 ?

　 ? Back in school ? ? 我们都梦想着这些 ?

　 ? we used to dream about this everyday ? 我穿得逊毙了 I"m super underdressed. 别抱怨了 Stop complaining, all right? 你能不舒服到哪去 You think you feel outta place? 这是迄今为止我待过的 This is one of the brightest rooms I"ve ever been in, 最白的地方 in my life. 白

　哪个白 Bright? What do you mean, bright? 白人的白 Like white. -白人的白

　-对 - Oh, "bright" is white? - Yeah, man. 就我和服务员以及大人小孩双拍档是黑人 It"s only me, the waiters and Boyz II Men. 已经有三个人说他们喜欢我的音乐 I"ve already had three people tell me they love my music. ? 来一点点东海岸摇摆 ?

　 ? Doin" a little east coast swing ? ? 大人小孩双拍档就在这唱 ?

　 ? Boyz II Men going off ? 公事来了 Duty calls. 那支舞我们改日再约 I"ll take a snow check on that dance. -这是加拿大版本的改天再约

　-好的 - Canadian for "rain check." - Okay. 好的 Okay. ? 万众瞩目 ?

　 ? watch us do this ? ? 就在费城现场表演 ?

　 ? Live and direct from Philly town ? 哥们你喝得有点多啊

　Man, you"re pounding "em kinda hard, don"t you think? 我今天被炒了 I got fired today, man. 你明明说是辞职 You told me you quit. 我是被迫辞职的

　因为 I was forced to quit because of... 无所谓 Yeah, okay, man. 随便编 Lie to me some more. 你没事吧 You good? 靠

　国务卿本卿在看我们吗 Shit. Is the secretary of state looking at us? 她在看你吗 Oh, she"s looking at you? 弗雷德 Fred. 弗雷德

　搞什么

　什么情况 Fred. What the hell? What was that? 问你话呢

　什么情况 Damn. Hey, what was that? 我 I... 我好像

　好像见过她 Kinda... I kinda know her. Okay? -你好像见过她

　-对 - You kinda know her? - Yeah. 谁没见过夏洛特·菲尔德啊 Nobody kinda knows Charlotte Field, all right? 要是你好像见过美人鱼的话 It"s like kinda knowing a mermaid, dude. 还可以说来听听

　毕竟大家都没见过 You tell people that shit. That"s exceptional. 好吧

　我给你讲个事 Okay. I"ll tell you a story. 那年我 13 岁

　她 16 岁 So, I"m like 13, she"s like 16. 她是我的保姆 She"s my babysitter.

　Boyz II Men 《It"s So Hard To Say Goodbye To Yesterday》 她很完美

　待我很好

　She"s like, perfect. She"s very nice to me, 对我很有帮助 which goes a long way with me. 有一次我们在她家里 So, we"re at her house... 她在练习演讲自己写的稿子 She"s practicing a speech that she"s writing. 准备竞选学生会主席 She"s running for Student Council president. 你知道每年 Did you know that every year, 学校会扔掉 500 多吨♥的可回收垃圾吗 the school throws away over 500 tons of recyclable garbage? -根本没人在乎

　-对

　太糟糕了 - And no one cares. - I know, it"s total bullshit. 但你怎么让那些蠢货在乎 But how do you get idiots to care about shit 这些东西呢 they don"t care about? 他们会在乎的 They"ll just care 因为这是一件值得在乎的事 because it"s the right thing to care about. 乔治·布♥什♥总统和丹·奎尔副总统加起来 You"re more inspiring than George Bush 也没有你更能鼓舞人心 and Dan Quayle combined. 其实这不难 Well, that"s not too hard. 她很棒

　很聪明 Well, she was amazing, and she was smart, 而且她好像有点喜欢我 and she seemed to kinda like me, 我觉我们也有一瞬间 and I felt like we were having a moment. 你懂我意思吗

　就是心动的一瞬间 You know what I mean? Like a romantic moment. 靠 Oh, shit. 所以我做了件事 So I did something, 现在想想非常不合适 that in retrospect was highly inappropriate. 我吻了她

　I kissed her. 我低头一看 I looked down... 我那 13 岁的小♥弟♥弟♥竟然勃起了 I got a fucking 13-year-old boner, man! -天哪

　-很硬

　虽然不大 - Oh! - Hard... But not big. 但是很硬

　它好像在宣告 But hard. And pronounced, 13 岁的勃起 "13-year-old boner." 对不起 Sorry. 她看见了

　看见了

　然后她说 And she looks at it. She sees it. And she goes... 没关系 It"s okay. 然后 And then, 她男朋友在隔壁房♥间 her boyfriend comes into the room, 刚看完电视剧《Blossom》走进来 who was in the other room watching Blossom! 宝贝 Hey, babe. 他妈的指着我的小♥弟♥弟♥ Points out my fucking little boner. -嘲笑我

　-看呐 - He makes a joke! - Whoa! 然后他们就走了 And they left. 对不起 I"m sorry. 留下我和那 13 岁的勃起小♥弟♥弟♥ And I"m left standing there alone... in the kitchen, 孤独地待在厨房♥里 with my little, hard 13-year-old fucking boner. 硬得像石头一样 Hard as a rock. 另外他妈的那个竞选她输了 And on top of that, she didn"t win the fucking election. 比尔·斯特林赢了 Bill Sterling won 他以两个舞会赢了

　because he ran on a two-prom platform. -两个舞会

　-两个连续的舞会 - Two-prom! - Two-proms! Back-to-back! 她根本没有赢的机会 She didn"t stand a fucking chance. 是没有 No, man. 我觉得你忽略了故事的主要情节 I think you"re skimming over the best part of that story. 什么主要情节 What"s the best part of that story? 她说你的小♥弟♥弟♥可以 She says your boner was okay. 她之所以说可以 She said, "It"s okay," like she was trying 只是想让我觉得心里好受些 to not make me fucking feel bad. 弗雷德

　你觉得这是个糟糕的故事 Fred, you see a fucked-up story, 而我觉得这是个

　你喜欢的美丽姑娘 when I see a beautiful story about a girl that you liked, 也喜欢你的小♥弟♥弟♥的纯爱故事 liking your boner in all of its okay-ness. 你今晚就去跟她聊聊 You need to talk to her tonight. 她可能都不记得我了 She probably doesn"t remember who I am. 就算她记得我 If she does remember who I am, 她最不想要的就是 the last thing she wants is 我挺着 13 岁的小♥弟♥弟♥那种冲动向她走去 my 13-year-old-boner having fucking ass walking up to her. -听着

　-打扰下 - Look... - Excuse me. 国务卿菲尔德女士想和你谈谈 Secretary Field would like to speak with you. 和我 With me? 是和他吗 With him, right? -对

　-现在 - Yeah. - Right now? 知道为什么吗

　Uh, do you know why? 跟我来 This way. 太好了 This is good. 你紧张什么 What are you nervous about? 搞什么

　我刚才不是都告诉你了吗 What the fuck? Everything I just said! ? 我将珍藏这段回忆 ?

　 ? And I"ll take with me the memories ? ? 让它成为我心头阴郁后的阳光 ?

　 ? To be my sunshine after the rain ? 我的天

　她就在那 Oh, my God, dude, there she is. 你要跟她说什么 What are you gonna say to her? 不知道 I don"t know. 一上来就否定她 Should open with a neg. 就说她太高了 Tell her she"s too tall. 我才不会否定国务卿呢 I"m not gonna neg the secretary of state. 很高兴见到你 It was so nice to see you. 我也是 You as well. 需要我的时候给我个信♥号♥♥ Give me the signal when you need me. -你好

　-你好 - Hi. - Hi. 我被人带过来的 A man brought me here. 抱歉 Yes, sorry about that. 没事

　我不介意 Um... No, not at all. 我对你有种似曾相识的感觉 I can"t shake this feeling that we know each other. -我们认识

　-我们认识 - We do. - We do? 对

　Yeah. 我们的确认识 We do know each other. 所以不是我错觉 Okay, so I"m not crazy. -我是弗雷德

　-弗雷德 - Uh, I"m Fred. - Fred... 那时我更矮点 I was shorter, -但除此之外

　-弗拉斯基 - but other than that... - Flarsky? 对

　我♥草♥ Yeah! Holy fuck! 难以置信

　你竟然记得 I can"t believe it. You remember. 我的天

　看看你 Oh, my God, look at you! 看看我 Look at me, yes. 你怎么在这 What are you doing here? 我朋友兰斯

　那是兰斯 My friend, Lance... That"s Lance. 你好吗 Hey, how you doing? 他带我来看大人小孩双拍档 He, uh, he just brought me here to see Boyz II Men. 我刚刚见了他们 I just met them. -你见到他们了

　-对 - You met the Men? - Yeah. -感觉如何

　-别告诉别人 - What was it like? - Don"t tell anybody, 我觉得这是我人生中最精彩的部分 but it was the highlight of my life. 我完全理解 Oh, I totally get that. 我还见了达♥赖♥喇♥嘛♥ And I"ve met the Dalai Lama. 草他 Fuck him. 他有几首热歌♥啊

　一首也没有 How many hits does he have? None. -不要真的草他

　他是个好人

　-对

　- Don"t actually fuck him. He"s a wonderful man. - Yeah. 最近在忙什么

　肯定是很赞的事情 What are you doing these days? I bet it"s something amazing. -确实很赞

　-恩 - It"s pretty amazing. - Yeah. 但是处于酝酿期吧 Uh, yeah, but it"s still in its, uh, gestation period, I guess. 还没开始做呢 I don"t need to get into it. 你呢

　你平时忙什么 What about you, what have you been up to? 你是国务卿

　我说笑的 You"re the secretary... I"m joking. 我知道你在忙什么

　对

　你非常 I know what you"ve been up to. Yeah. You"re very, um... 我只是

　我只是想说 You know, I just, I... I just wanna say it"s, like, 很高兴看到你取得今天的成绩 amazing to see what you"ve done with your life. 很多人嘴上说要干一番大事 A lot of people say they"re gonna do 但从没付诸行动 all this incredible stuff and they don"t do anything, 但你却做到了

　祝贺你 but you actually did it all, so, congrats. 我还在努力 Well, I"m trying. 你已经做到了 I think you"ve done it. 帕克·福克斯 Parker Wembley. 我烦死这个人了 I hate this guy. 帕克·福克斯

　卖♥♥报纸的 Parker Wembley, the guy who buys and sells newspapers 还认为飓风是同性结婚造成的 and thinks that hurricanes are caused by gay marriage? 你认识他 You know him? 他过来了 He"s coming over here. -在我后面吗

　-对 - Is he behind me?

　- Yeah. 终于见到你了

　国务卿菲尔德

　Finally. Secretary Field. 帕克

　你好吗 Parker, how are you? 你今晚真是美得不可方物 You are looking particularly gorgeous tonight. 谢谢 Thank you. 这几个月来我一直在努力联♥系♥你 I... I"ve been trying to set a meeting with you 想安排个见面 for some months now, and, uh... 你是在躲我吗 I mean, have you been avoiding me? 没有

　没有 No! No. 看来我还是没躲过 Not successful...

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