励志又幽默的英文演讲稿
发布时间:2017-01-25 来源: 幽默笑话 点击： 
励志又幽默的英文演讲稿篇一：搞笑的英语演讲稿
幽默英语演讲稿
love your mother
爱你的母亲
why are you crying, a young boy asked his mom?你为什么哭?一个小男孩问他的妈妈. because im a woman, she told him. 因为我是女人,她告诉他.
i dont understand, he said.我不明白.他回答
his mom just hugged him and said, and you never will, but thats o.k........ 妈妈拥抱了他说,你永远也不会明白,但没关系...later the little boy asked his father, why does mom seem to cry for no reason?.后来小男孩问他的父亲妈妈为什么似乎在无缘无故的哭泣? all women cry for no reason, was all his dad could say......所有的女人都会
常常没有原因地哭泣,这是他的父亲唯一可以解释的...the little boy grew up and
became a man,
still wondering why women cry. 等到小男孩长大,成了男人的时候, 他仍然奇怪妈妈为什么哭.finally he put in a call to god and when god got back to him, he asked god, why
do women cry so easily?
最后他把这件事祷告给上帝,他问上帝,为什么女人容易哭泣?god answered...... 上帝回答:
when i made woman,
i decided she had to be special. i made her shouldersstrong enough to carry
the weight of the world, yet, 当我创造女人的时候,我决定把她造的很特别,
我让她的双肩强壮的足以能够承担整个世界,但是, 却让她的双臂温柔的足够去安慰他人... i gave her the inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection
even from her own children.我给她内在的力量去忍受生产的剧痛, 也让她有勇气承受无数的伤害,甚至这些伤害有时会来自于自己的孩子...i gave her a hardnessthat allows her
to keep going and take care
of her family and friends,even when everyone else gives up, through sickness and fatigue without我给她顽强,让她能够不断地前进, 并且照顾自己的家人和朋友,甚至当每个人都放弃的时候,她却能够坚强地在疾病和劳累之时毫无怨言... i gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances.
even when her child has hurt her badly.... she has the very special power to make a childs boo-boo feel better and to quell
a teenagers anxieties and fears....我给她内心的敏感,让她在任何环境下都深爱着自己的孩子.甚至在他们深深伤害她的时
候．．．
她用那特别的力量，让年幼孩子的在受伤的时候感到安慰，也能够让年轻的子女消除紧
张与恐惧．．．
i gave her strength to care for her husband, despite faultsand i fashioned
her from his rib to protect his heart....我给她力量关心她的丈夫，尽管他会犯错．我用男人的肋骨创造了女人，使女人可以保
护男人的心脏．．．
i gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes
tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly.... 我给她智慧，让她知道一个好丈夫永远不会伤害他的妻子，但有时候会试炼她坚定的永
远跟随自己丈夫的能力与决心．for all of this hard work,i also gave her a tear to shed.it is hers to use
whenever needed and
it is her only weakness....when you see her cry, tell her how much you love her, and all she does for everyone, and even thoughshe may still cry, you will have made her heart feel good.因为这些种种的困
难，
我也同样赐她流下眼泪，
这是当她在需要时可以使用的，这是她唯一的软弱之处．．．当你看到她哭泣的时候，告诉她你有多么地爱她，
告诉她她为所有人所做的一切，即使这样她可能还是会哭泣，但你会使她的心里得到安慰．she is special!
please send this to women you know, and those with mothers,sisters, and special
women in their lives.
她是独特的！
请把这个信息传递给你认识的女人， 有母亲，姐妹和特别的女性在他们生命里的人．
but, also send this to men so they will understand about what a wonderful thing
a woman is.篇二：中英文幽默演讲 幽默演讲——调侃自己（中英对照） 演讲者如何调侃自己 创新句子：你们或者睡觉，或者不睡，只要不打呼噜，我就接着讲。 幽默注释：演讲者讲得太糟糕了，组织者哭得很伤心。 演讲结束时，宴会主人感谢你从繁忙的日程中抽出时间来——你泰然自若，优雅地点头
微笑着，心里非常清楚你日历上唯一的事情就是就早餐后喝点咖啡。 poise is when you finish your speech and the toastmaster thanks you for taking
time out of your busy schedule to be a part of their program --- and you nod and smile
graciously knowing full well that the only thing on your calendar is a little coffee
from breakfast. 幽默注释：一些老干部退休后没什么事干，有人请他参加一些活动，他还假装很忙，好
象推开了很多事才赶去似的。过去我演讲时常常会比较紧张，但那时我看到一条信息说如果你想象所有的观众都是裸
体会有所帮助。此时此刻，我站在这里想象着观众都是裸体，真的起作用，我不再紧张了，
但眼睛有些疲劳。
i used to get nervous when giving a speech but then i read that it helps to think
of the entire audience as being naked. and so, at this very moment, i’m standing up here imagining every one in this audience as being naked. and it really
works. i no suffer from nervousness. eyestrain. yes. 幽默注释：把观众想象成裸体，意思是我不怕你们，就不紧张了。创新句子：大部分人站在讲台上都会有点儿紧张，我属于少部分人，我非常紧张。 我本人
never been conceited --- and i can’t tell you how much i admire myself for that.幽默句子：他因为自己不自负，所以变得非常骄傲。创新句子：我一点儿都不自负，我希望别人也这么看我。 我先用简单明了的英语演讲，以后我再翻译给律师听。 let me put this into plain english. i’ll translate it for the lawyers later.
幽默注释：律师总喜欢用复杂的语言，简单的话都听不懂了。 创新句子：我的讲话有三个版本，小学生版本，中学生版本，大学生版本，你是听小学
一年纪版的，还是小学二年纪版的？如果你听过这个故事，请不要打断我，我就知道这一个故事。 if you’ve already heard this story, please don’t stop me because it’s the only
one i know.
幽默注释：就是你知道两个故事，讲故事前也可以这么说。创新句子：我讲个笑话，如果你们听过，也希望装做没听过，我也这样照顾你们。 演讲就象给草坪浇水，如果有四分之一的水渗下去你就满意了。 making a speech is like watering a lawn. you’re satisfied if just a quarter of
it sinks in.
幽默注释：有人打呼噜，有人说话，都是正常的，有四分之一观众听就不错了。幽默句子：即兴演讲的开场白。创新句子：我不知道你们会不会喜欢我的演讲，我不知道我要讲点儿什么。 开始前我想告诉你们下面的演讲已经编辑成了电视节目，我现在少讲20分钟，我们能够
及时赶回家看2台的节目。before i begin, i want you to know that the following speech has been edited for
television. i cut 20 minutes out of it so we could all get home in time for the game
on channel 2. 幽默注释：放着现场不看，偏要回家在电视上看。 可能你们有些人知道我今晚出现在这里有两个原因：第一个原因是你们的计划委员会一
直在设法寻找一个聪明、有趣、老练的演讲者，——他们找到了。第二个原因是那个人病了，
所以就打电话把我找来了。
幽默注释：一开始好象在说自己很牛，其实就是个临时替场。 创新句子：我认为我演讲很风趣，可为什么没人笑呢？ 有人有舞台恐惧症，我没有；舞台不会怎么样我，是观众快把我吓死了！ some people
suffer from stage fright. i don’t. the stage doesn’t bother me at all. it’s the
audience that scares the hell out of me! 幽默注释：stage fright舞台恐惧症，而不是舞台吓唬我。我们每个人都希望能在某一时刻把时钟拨回去。如果我能够把时钟拨回去 at one time
or another, i think each of us has wished we could turn back the clock. i know if
i could turn back the clock just 45 minutes, i’d be the happiest person in this room.
because that’s when i left my speech on the kitchen table. 幽默注释：自己上台前
还在刻苦练习，演讲稿落家里了，讲错了希望观众包涵。我不想吹牛，但上次我演讲时所有的观众都站了起来，他们再也没有坐下，直到走到他
们的汽车那儿。i don’t want to brag, but the last time i did this it brought the audience to
its feet. and they never sat down again until they reached their cars. 幽默注释：观众听他演讲，都站起来走了，他还在吹牛呢。创新句子：我演讲时用一种平缓的语速娓娓道来，观众睡得很香甜。 如果我有点儿犹豫，你们一定要原谅我，这是我第一次饭后演讲——在卖当劳里冲我的
小孩儿喊叫除外。
if i’m a little hesitant, you’ll have to excuse me. this is the first after-dinner
speech i’ve ever made ---except for yelling at my kids in mcdonald’s. 幽默注释：
自嘲自己演讲没什么经验。 创新句子：你可能知道我已经养成了饭后演讲的习惯。 我不习惯面对这么多观众演讲，让我鼓起勇气的一件事情就是我在谈论我最喜欢的题目
——我。
i’m not used to speaking to such a large audience. the one thing that gives me
courage is that i’m speaking on my favorite subject --- me. 幽默注释：电视上老是邀请一些名人在那儿大谈自己，这些人开场可以这么说。人们总问我为什么我戴顶10加仑的红色帽子（或者一些其它非常显眼的衣服饰品），我
告诉他们那是我采取的积极现实的生活态度。我知道不管发生什么事情，善良的上帝总在注
视着我们。现在地球上有60亿人，我希望上帝能从芸芸众生中一眼就挑出我来。people always ask me why i wear a big red ten gallon hat (or some other very
noticeable article of clothing) and i tell them. it has to do with taking a positive
but practical view of life. for instance, i know that no matter what happens, the
good lord is watching over us. then again, there are now six billion of us, so i want
to make darn sure he can pick me out of the crowd.篇三：幽默英语演讲稿
幽默英语演讲稿
love your mother
爱你的母亲
why are you crying, a young boy asked his mom?你为什么哭?一个小男孩问他的妈妈. because im a woman, she told him. 因为我是女人,她告诉他.
i dont understand, he said.我不明白.他回答
his mom just hugged him and said, and you never will, but thats o.k........ 妈妈拥抱了他说,你永远也不会明白,但没关系...later the little boy asked his father, why does mom seem to cry for no reason?.后来小男孩问他的父亲妈妈为什么似乎在无缘无故的哭泣? all women cry for no reason, was all his dad could say...... 所有的女人都会
常常没有原因地哭泣,这是他的父亲唯一可以解释的... the little boy grew up and became a man,still wondering why women cry. 等到小男孩长大,成了男人的时候, 他仍然奇怪妈妈为什么哭.finally he put in a call to god and when god got back to him, he asked god, why
do women cry so easily?
最后他把这件事祷告给上帝,他问上帝,为什么女人容易哭泣? god answered......上帝回答:
when i made woman,
i decided she had to be special. i made her shouldersstrong enough to carry
the weight of the world, yet, 当我创造女人的时候,我决定把她造的很特别,
我让她的双肩强壮的足以能够承担整个世界,但是, 却让她的双臂温柔的足够去安慰他人... i gave her the inner strength to endure childbirthand the rejection
even from her own children.我给她内在的力量去忍受生产的剧痛, 也让她有勇气承受无数的伤害,甚至这些伤害有时会来自于自己的孩子...i gave her a hardnessthat allows her
励志又幽默的英文演讲稿篇二：幽默英语演讲稿
幽默英语演讲稿
love your mother
爱你的母亲
why are you crying, a young boy asked his mom?
你为什么哭?一个小男孩问他的妈妈.
"because i'm a woman," she told him.
因为我是女人,她告诉他.
"i don't understand," he said.
我不明白.他回答
his mom just hugged him and said,
"and you never will, but that's o.k.".......
妈妈拥抱了他说,"你永远也不会明白,但没关系..."
later the little boy asked his father,
"why does mom seem to cry for no reason?".
后来小男孩问他的父亲"妈妈为什么似乎在无缘无故的哭泣?"
"all women cry for no reason," was all his dad could say......"所有的女人都会常常没有原因地哭泣",这是他的父亲唯一可以解释的...the little boy grew up and became a man,
still wondering why women cry.
等到小男孩长大,成了男人的时候,
他仍然奇怪妈妈为什么哭.
finally he put in a call to god and when god got back to him, he asked "god, why do women cry so easily?"
最后他把这件事祷告给上帝,他问"上帝,为什么女人容易哭泣?"god answered......
上帝回答:
"when i made woman,
i decided she had to be special.
i made her shoulders
strong enough to carry
the weight of the world, yet,
made her arms gentle enough to give comfort...
"当我创造女人的时候,
我决定把她造的很特别,
我让她的双肩强壮的足以能够承担整个世界,但是,
却让她的双臂温柔的足够去安慰他人...
i gave her the inner strength
to endure childbirth
励志又幽默的英文演讲稿篇三：美式幽默英语演讲稿
演讲中的美式幽默 美国人爱幽默，特别是大庭广众之中，演讲者丢包袱、甩噱头，营造出一种轻松欢快、
与听众互动的氛围，已经是现代美国文化的一种常态。马克-吐温的幽默细胞，已俨然浸入到
美国文化的血液中。
市长的幽默
崔永元先生介绍了波斯顿市长在与中国市长同僚们会面时演说的幽默，波斯顿市长说道，
他绝对没有中国市长们那么威风，他在波斯顿当市长，更多的时候感觉自己就象个“墓地看
守”，“看起来人挺多”但——“没有一个听我的”。 呵呵。 那是当然的啰，在美国是个
人主义得道，强调天赋人权，人人平等。 不象中国，千年来儒家的“君臣父子长幼有序”，
人的尊严完全奠立于手中握有权力的大小。 当了官，尤其当了个“高官”，周围多半会有一
批马屁精们围绕。马屁精们放弃自己的尊严，整天把领导的官衔挂在嘴上，使得我们领导的
感觉不要太好哦！
看看山东作协里的“作家”——在四川汶川地震时为追思被埋葬在废墟下的学生写的诗
——对领导的吹捧和赞美到了不知人间羞耻的地步！ 没看现在国内，大家千军万马争当“公务员”—— 其中必 有不少人恐怕为的就是想要出人头地，期待身边有人来给他溜须拍马嘛！可在美国，是不流行拍马屁的哎！ 牧师的幽默
去过美国教会听礼拜的大凡都有体会，美国牧师大多讲道时比较幽默，气氛活跃；不象
国内牧师那样常常板起脸教训人，把讲道搞得枯燥无味。有一次去教会参加美国朋友的一个婚礼，主持婚礼的牧师认真地向这对新人祝福，愿他
俩“making love everyday!” 这句话，直白点的翻译便是：做爱每一天！ 当然也可以有柔和点的翻译：恩爱每一天！ 完全木有过去在国内婚礼上主持人对新人的励志话语：共同携手——抓革命、促生产、
为国家多做贡献（其实也只让生一个），，，哈哈！ 葬礼上的幽默
美国人演讲的幽默甚至连葬礼也不放过。 我在美国通过电视直播观看了苹果公司创建人乔布斯去世后的葬礼现场，苹果公司的一
位高管，在葬礼上发表激情演说，他谈到乔布斯一向追求细节的完美，不能容忍任何的细节
疏忽。 演讲者说他“曾经多次陪乔布斯外出公干”，每到一地在宾馆住下，他把自
己携带的行李中的衣物取出、摆放好，就立马会接到乔布斯打来的电话，乔布斯对这家宾馆
房间乃至对这 个宾馆的某个细节不满意，要他“收拾行李”，准备跟他“换宾馆饭店”。以致后来他再陪乔布斯外出，到宾馆住下后，他连自己的行李都不敢打开，就坐在房间
电话机旁边等——等乔布斯打电话来，准备换宾馆，“这样比较方便”，省得把东西刚拿出来，
又要放进去。
会场一片笑声，哎，这哪像“葬礼”啊？ 有木有搞错？ 偶滴油墨 幽默英语演讲稿
love your mother
爱你的母亲
why are you crying, a young boy asked his mom?你为什么哭?一个小男孩问他的妈妈. because im a woman, she told him. 因为我是女人,她告诉他.
i dont understand, he said.我不明白.他回答
his mom just hugged him and said, and you never will, but thats o.k........ 妈妈拥抱了他说,你永远也不会明白,但没关系...later the little boy asked his father, why does mom seem to cry for no reason?.后来小男孩问他的父亲妈妈为什么似乎在无缘无故的哭泣? all women cry for no reason, was all his dad could say......所有的女人都会
常常没有原因地哭泣,这是他的父亲唯一可以解释的...the little boy grew up and
became a man,
still wondering why women cry. 等到小男孩长大,成了男人的时候, 他仍然奇怪妈妈为什么哭.finally he put in a call to god and when god got back to him, he asked god, why
do women cry so easily?
最后他把这件事祷告给上帝,他问上帝,为什么女人容易哭泣?god answered...... 上帝回答:
when i made woman,
i decided she had to be special. i made her shouldersstrong enough to carry
the weight of the world, yet, 当我创造女人的时候,我决定把她造的很特别,
我让她的双肩强壮的足以能够承担整个世界,但是, 却让她的双臂温柔的足够去安慰他人... i gave her the inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection
even from her own children.我给她内在的力量去忍受生产的剧痛, 也让她有勇气承受无数的伤害,甚至这些伤害有时会来自于自己的孩子...i gave her a hardnessthat allows her
to keep going and take careof her family and friends,even when everyone else gives up, through sickness and fatigue without我给她顽强,让她能够不断地前进, 并且照顾自己的家人和朋友,甚至当每个人都放弃的时候,她却能够坚强地在疾病和劳累之时毫无怨言... i gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances.
even when her child has hurt her badly.... she has the very special power to make a childs boo-boo feel better and to quell
a teenagers anxieties and fears....我给她内心的敏感,让她在任何环境下都深爱着自己的孩子.甚至在他们深深伤害她的时
候．．．
她用那特别的力量，让年幼孩子的在受伤的时候感到安慰，也能够让年轻的子女消除紧
张与恐惧．．．
i gave her strength to care for her husband, despite faultsand i fashioned
her from his rib to protect his heart....我给她力量关心她的丈夫，尽管他会犯错．我用男人的肋骨创造了女人，使女人可以保
护男人的心脏．．．
i gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes
tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly.... 我给她智慧，让她知道一个好丈夫永远不会伤害他的妻子，但有时候会试炼她坚定的永
远跟随自己丈夫的能力与决心．for all of this hard work,i also gave her a tear to shed.it is hers to use
whenever needed and
when you see her cry, tell her how much you love her, and all she does for everyone, and even thoughshe may still cry, you will have made her heart feel good.因为这些种种的困
难，
我也同样赐她流下眼泪，
这是当她在需要时可以使用的，这是她唯一的软弱之处．．．当你看到她哭泣的时候，告诉她你有多么地爱她，
告诉她她为所有人所做的一切，即使这样她可能还是会哭泣，但你会使她的心里得到安慰．she is special!
please send this to women you know, and those with mothers,sisters, and special
women in their lives.
她是独特的！
请把这个信息传递给你认识的女人， 有母亲，姐妹和特别的女性在他们生命里的人． but, also send this to men so they will understand about what a wonderful thing
a woman is.篇三：【英语】美式幽默
1. is she big-boned?她是不是很魁梧啊？
big-bone看字面解释就知道是指骨架很粗大。这对美女(美国的女人) 来说是见怪不怪
的。在电影something about mary中就有这一句，is she big-boned?那娇小的女子怎么说？娇小就是petite。很多从亚洲来女生来美国都抱怨买不到合适的
衣服，其实很多店都有一区petite。去那里找找，保证你会有意想不到的收获。若是真的找
不到，就试试teenager那儿也有许多合适的衣服。
2. we have a female shortage here。 我们这里闹女人荒。
由于我的学校是理工学院， 所以男女比例自然是不均匀， 有一次连老美也不禁感叹道，
we have a female shortage here。这样的说法是不是听来很特别？其实我看根本就不只是
female shortage而是 female drought。或是更夸张一点的讲法，we have a female
extinction here。
3. you are a freaking yankee。 你是怪怪的北方佬。
老美彼此之间很喜欢拿对方的出生地作文章。因为南北的差异， 所以或多或少北方人看
不起南方人，南方人也看不起北方人。yankee 是南北战争时北军的士兵叫yankee, 现在一
般指北方佬。而freaking是说这人很怪，或者解释成怪胎也可以。
4. i am laying low。我躲起来了。
有一次我问一个老美， how are you doing? 结果他回我i am laying low。结果在场
的老美都在笑，但是只有我听不懂。其实laying low就是说躲的低低的，怕被别人看到，就
是想办法混就对了。事后老美跟我解释说这句话其实没那么好笑，主要是因为我听不懂，大
家才又觉得更好笑。
5. i cut the cheese。我放屁了。
一般人说放屁这个字都会用fart这个字， 但是cut the cheese也有放屁的意思在里面。
为什么呢？因为大家想想切cheese时会发出什么声音？是不是和放屁很像呢？但是这样的
用法似乎并不常用，我只在某部很烂的片子：mysterious man里听过一次。
6. do you go out with your gun loaded? 你要带著你上膛的枪出门吗？此枪非彼枪。大家应该知道我指的是什么样的 枪, 这句也是我去看something about
mary这部电影时学到的。使用时机就是有些男人出去跟女人约会，满脑子想的就是如何跟她
上床，你要糗糗他，就可以这么说 do you go out with your gun loaded? she probably will
get hurt。
7. she is a big gossip。她是八卦夫人。
gossip平时指的是八卦新闻，但它也可以拿来形容一个人很八卦。所以she is a big gossip就是说她是个八卦夫人。或是你也可以说， she is gossipy。中文里讲的广播
电台在美国倒是不常见，反而是有另一种说说 she is an information bureau (她是情报局)
也蛮有趣的。
8. if the boys stare at you, they have guts to suck your teeth! 如果男生盯著你看，他们就有胆亲你。这是我看电视full house学来的， 是二个姐妹的对话，这句话有三个地方我觉的很棒，
第一个是stare at you, 就是指盯著人家看的意思，have guts 就是说有胆子的意思， (这
是一个巧合，中文英文说有胆子都是说有勇气的意思！)而最后一个 suck your teeth 则是
指亲嘴的意思，很有趣，但是像这种句子是小孩子说的，难登大雅之堂。 亲嘴还有另外一个口语的用法：smooch 例如 i didnt smooch that girl last night。
我昨晚没亲那个女孩。
9. she is vertically challenged
她的身高受到了挑战
这样的说法就是说人家很矮的意思，但是是比较婉转 (political correctness) 的说法。
什么challenged 就是说有某方面的障碍，如mentally challenged就是说心智障碍，也就
是低能儿的意思。
关于这个political correctness老美也常用，不过中文并没有适当相对应的翻法。所
谓的 political correctness就是说为了不得罪某一族群的人，而在用辞上加以修饰，让它
听来不会歧视某一族群。例如 chairman这个字，可能会得罪某些女性主义者，所以就发明
了chairperson这个字。这样子的转变，就可以算是 political correctness。
10. where can i dump these white elephants?这些无用的垃圾我要丢到哪里？比如说家中的286计算机用之无味，弃之可惜，放在那里一摆就是好几年，这种垃圾就
叫white elephant。只是这样的说法比较少见。不过有些人还是会这么用，我曾听一个老美
他说，the fountain is a white elephant. 意思是，这个喷水池真是废物。有些老美会在自家的庭院前办所谓的garage sale, 就是把一些家里很少用到的东西拿
出来卖。有些人的告示上会写white elephant sale。如果你不知道whte elephant指的是
无用之物的话，你可能会觉得蛮奇怪的，为什么有人在卖白大象呢？篇四：美式幽默美式幽默
中国式笑话与美国式笑话有很大的区别，你可以试着看看一下几个小故事，如果觉得真
心好笑。那么说明你具有美式幽默哦！ jack told his wife, helen, that he wanted to spend his vacation where he had never
been before. helen said, “how about the kitchen?” charles came home at four in the morning and found his wife lying awake in the
bed. where you until this hour of the morning? she screamed. ignoring what she asked, charelrs opened his bedroom closet and found a naked
man cringing on the floor.chareles asked, who is this man? dont change the subject! replied his wife.篇五：美式幽默的字幕翻译论文毕 业 论 文 学生姓名
学位层次 学 士
院 系 外 语
专 业 英 语
指导教师
完成日期 contents
abstract .......................................................................
.................. 1
abstract
(chinese) ......................................................................
.... 2
i.
introduction ...................................................................
相关热词搜索：英文 演讲稿 励志 幽默 励志又幽默的演讲稿 高中生幽默励志演讲稿
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